Without The Net

Havent been able to post for a while since our internet hasnt been reconnected yet. Stupid Ntl. One good thing however is that we will be getting a 1.5meg connection for the same price of our old 1meg one. Yippie. That means i can DL stuff 50% faster, which is always good. This 1.5 is nothing compared to the speeds I will soon be getting back home in sweden. 8mb/s feast your eyes on that my friend. Recently alot of new broadband companies have been popping up in sweden providing alot faster connections usually for less money than the big companies in sweden, like Telia and BBB. Providing you live in a city (preferably a big one) u can get very fast speeds very cheap. Luckily i live very close to the centre of the second biggest city in sweden so we should be getting faster internet back home quite soon.

Anyhow, Ive already started planning my next trip to Japan. In time for the cherry blossoms to bloom i'll be going there end of march-beginning of april. Better start saving money. Up until now the "saving" hasnt gone well. Ive spent moeny like a madman. On cds, mags, takeout, digital photo developing etc. And soon will be spending more on alcohol. Damn parties! ;)

The big red monster

I've been eaten, chewed, digested and spit out more than once before. Now it's happened again. There's not much to say really. You just have to swallow hard and move on. Which ofcourse is the hard part. Ive kindof developed this shell around my heart which doesnt let anyone in until it's 100% sure it's not going to be hurt. That doesnt bode well for me because i know that all guys, unless ur brad pitt, get shot down a few times and thats just a part of the game. But still, my heart and I are two completely separate entities and we have different opinions on this subject. In the end, somehow and why, my heart always wins.

Im going to bed. These things usually pass overnight. A night were ur confidence sinks to horribly great depths and you just want to blackout for a couple of hours. I sleep it off. Hopefully in the morning i'll feel better. I let my guard down too soon and now i have to face the consequences. Returning to Leicester will hopefully bring routine back to my life and i can regain some of the lost confidence. I'm getting tired of fighting with my shitty confidence day in and day out. It seriously feels like im a borderline manic-depressive. Sometimes i can feel so alive, times when life seems great and at other times (most of the time really) i feel like im trapped between a rock and a hard place. I know all people have these ups and downs but to me it feels like im at the top of Mt. Everest one moment and down the deepest sea the other. Time...

new piece

this is a quickie I put together. Mind you, the artwork is not mine and was therefore used without permission. I saw it while browsing and thought that maybe something fun could be done with it. I'm not very inspired at the moment, that seems to be the reason why i cant seem to make anything interesting lately. I sit with a potential piece for hours and then end up deleting the whole thing. Such a waste of time...well well

I'm happy

Im happy that ive finally found some places to go in Gothenburg that are actually quite fun. Im not happy about the fact that all good things happen just as your about to leave the country. Ive had more fun these last 3 weeks than ive had all summer (excluding Japan ofcourse). Meeting new people, having friends of from England all adds up to the evergrowing list of pros of my lovely city! Here's a list that won't make sense to you if you've never been here.

Monday: Måndagsklubben
Tuesday: Ici
Wednesday: Nefertiti
Thursday: Pusterviksteatern
Friday: Practically anywhere (nef anyone?)
Saturday: Nef or Sticky Fingers ( i prefer nef)
Sunday: ok, so sundays are not that much fun...but i cant think of anyplace that is fun on sundays really

So the fact that im having fun being in Sweden should be clear by now. And I can also say that i can't remember having this much fun while i was actually living here. The fact that i spend 6 months of the year away from here kinda puts everything in perspective. England is good aswell but the fact that clubs all shut at 2 am seriously limits the fun u can have. I mean just the fact that by the time u get out of the club and its starting to get light outside is nothing u will ever experience in leicester (unless u're into raves). And for some reason i dont think ive ever been so glad having swedish as my native tongue as now. That said, Im not very excited about the fact that I'll be in Leicester around this time on tuesday. I'm looking forward to seeing my friends but everything falls into the everyday routine so fast, it's quite depressing actually! And let's not get started about the weather. It takes alot of willpower to get your ass up and do the simplest things.

1) Girls, selfish? 2) Japanese movies

1) In the club tonight and a girl comes up to me and asks me to buy her a drink. What do i do? I assess the situation and determine that she only wants the drink and doesnt give a fuck about me. I predict that she will get the drink chat for a 10 minutes or so and then excuse herself to go to the bathroom and then leg it. What happens? Just that...I realize it's folly on my side to go along with it. Why do i do it...last time a girl came up to me and asked for a drink i managed to pull her without buying her a drink. Never again will i buy a girl a drink if i can sense their true (evil) intentions. I have heard that this trick is used by many girls to get free drinks and it pisses me off. Especially if they just use the guys for that reason. I have been out the last few days and spent more money than i have the last 2 months. Gotta stop spending so much money, being social can be quite expensive you know! :D
Another observation i've made of female selfishness is on the road. If you're trying to change lanes and the car that u'r trying to cut in front of let's you pass you can be sure it's not a woman driving that car. Happened to me twice the last week and it pisses me off....come on, really, what is that all about. As soon as they see that u want to get in between they speed up and hug the car infront. This is a gigantic generalization but as far as i know/have seen it's true. And with the exception of my mum women arent very good drivers. I never really understood when men used to joke about womens driving. But i became very evident when i got my license and got some road experience. Don't get me wrong, there are some really crappy male drivers aswell. And these people are so scared of driving on the road that they're a hazard to themselves and other motorists. They shouldn't be allowed to drive.


2) If u get the chance watch the Dual project "fight to the death" films "2LDK" and "Aragami". Two really good films on the topic of "duel to the death". The movies were born out of a bet btw two well-respected japanese directors after a night of binge drinking. They're both quality movies and but i would have to say that "2LDK" is slightly better. You'll just have to watch and judge for yourself. The rules set out for the films were that 1) The were allowed a maximum of 3 characters 2) A small budget 3) 1 week to complete 4) A duel to the death. "2LDK" is about two models/actresses fighting it out and "Aragami" is a superb samurai face-off. Both very different movies but equally entertaining.