Friday, December 17

I'm back, taking it easy this time...

it's been a few hours since we broke up and ive had time to think. She kind of broke it off and i would be lying if i said i wasnt quite hurt by it. But I couldn't really do anything about it, she had thought about it for quite some time it seemed and reached a conclusion. I went out with arvin and had a beer and just chilled out. We went to Sticky, a old high school hang out and i got a bit nostalgic. Swedish guys must truly be the most frustrated guys in the world. After the conversation ended with maria earlier today i asked her not to contact me until i contacted her, just to have some time to think (and get over her, even though it didn't last for very long i developed some strong feelings for her). When arvin and I were out i got a call from her...and just now when i got back, literally about 5min ago i got a text message saying she has made the biggest mistake of her life and realised how much she loves me and cant be without me. Writing it like this might sound abit narcissistic of me but there is no other way of conveying her message.
What can i do...what indeed. I like her very much and i really dont mind the distance, this is the best thing that has happened to me for as long as i can remember. But i have to keep quiet for a while longer. I can't give in just yet. For my own sake, since she didn't really consider this when she said the things she did earlier today. Now she has had time to think about her actions, this probably sounds horrible but i think its the only way of making sure the relationship remains healthy in the future. I don't know how much sense i'm making right now...listening to some of hte music she sent me isnt helping me concentrate either :/ Relationships are difficult, I'm lost.

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